It is the last day of 2022. I am writing this post sitting in the second room. I submitted my Ph.D. thesis a few days back. It feels surreal to know that I finally managed to do it.
However, I have been suffering from bouts of severe stress. The future is unclear. With no job in hand, with no guarantee of a job, with simply no earnings at this point, I feel ashamed of myself and my mind seems to be plunging into despair, a deep void. I feel stuck and depressed.
2022 has been a mixed year for me. It started with great optimism. I was happy with my work although constantly stressed about completing that Ph.D.
I also had to leave my job. I left the job I was enjoying so much. The last time I felt such joy was in studying Sanskrit at the bachelor's level. The last time I felt as celebrated as in my job was during LSR and during my relationship. I loved organizing college fests and getting to meet more people. I felt elated when meeting him during his Delhi stays. This job that I lost this year was the second inning of my LSR-like life.
I managed to briefly reunite with a long-lost love. We parted ways sometime later. I miss him but I guess I am okay. I am sure he will find somebody way better.
I was lost on the Ph.D. front earlier this year. I began the year with no hopes of earning a Ph.D. I submitted it a few days back. What started from death valley peaked at the zenith of lively pleasure. I termed my Ph.D. Pikachu. My Pikachu happened. Wow.
All in all, my year has been a long tiring and mixed one.
Here's to the hope of finding success in 2023!
