I have no words to express. But to express has become a dire need for me. Have you felt this way ever before? A deep sinking feeling. Does it happen to you that you plan something for days and then at the finalized day, the entire plan crashes? Say for you birthday party? You plan the decoration, cake, everything to the most minute detail but nothing turns up the way you had wanted. Bad. No? That is the 'sinking feeling'. When expectations deceive. Hopes go low. And if you know it is your fault, blaming does not work.
I do not have the case of a crashed birthday party. Nor do I take birthday plans so seriously. But some other plans seem highly important to me. Plans of life. No. Not Career plans. Careers can seem way too secondary when you realize that somewhere you have failed to do the job God had hired you to do. God will not fire you because he loves you. But your self will kill. A good Career may brighten your future. But to be a better human will definitely enlighten your life; your soul; your mind;everything.
I will not elucidate on what happened. Not because I should not but because I cannot.
'Somebody looks up to me to seek help but I do not realize the severity of his situation and avert helping him.' To paraphrase the episode, this line could be quite helpful. This is more or less what has happened.
For a minute, I can even forget that there is something called the 'Supreme Power'. But that is no reason why I should not feel guilty. Be it for the sake of God or any such powers, lending a hand to someone is a Human Duty. For me at least. Forget even that. Humanity is a far thought. Many times, I have needed somebody to guide me. To hold my hand and take me to the right direction. Why can I not be that hand to somebody?
It feels bad. But I can not get any idea on what to do next. 'It was a mistake' is just a euphemism for 'It really was my fault. I am guilty'. This is human nature. Justification. You see, when we succeed at helping someone, we are so highly proud.Why? 'I helped him dude, should not I be proud? I faced problems only to keep ABC out of a few.' The 'I' becomes so dominant.
But when we fail at same. we justify. 'I was not in a position to. I have my own priorities. How could I have helped yaar?God will do something.I can just think good for him' Now. God has the responsibilities.
This is the fight that usually goes on. I v/s God. Pride versus Justification. That is the moment when not our degrees but our virtues matter. When life teaches a lesson, it usually is a permanent one. One that we keep with ourselves throughout the different phases of seeing the world.
So, for me. It is the time to get working. I will not justify. I will work not just to make myself not feel guilty but also to bring a smile on somebody's face. Hope it will work.
I do not have the case of a crashed birthday party. Nor do I take birthday plans so seriously. But some other plans seem highly important to me. Plans of life. No. Not Career plans. Careers can seem way too secondary when you realize that somewhere you have failed to do the job God had hired you to do. God will not fire you because he loves you. But your self will kill. A good Career may brighten your future. But to be a better human will definitely enlighten your life; your soul; your mind;everything.
I will not elucidate on what happened. Not because I should not but because I cannot.
'Somebody looks up to me to seek help but I do not realize the severity of his situation and avert helping him.' To paraphrase the episode, this line could be quite helpful. This is more or less what has happened.
For a minute, I can even forget that there is something called the 'Supreme Power'. But that is no reason why I should not feel guilty. Be it for the sake of God or any such powers, lending a hand to someone is a Human Duty. For me at least. Forget even that. Humanity is a far thought. Many times, I have needed somebody to guide me. To hold my hand and take me to the right direction. Why can I not be that hand to somebody?
It feels bad. But I can not get any idea on what to do next. 'It was a mistake' is just a euphemism for 'It really was my fault. I am guilty'. This is human nature. Justification. You see, when we succeed at helping someone, we are so highly proud.Why? 'I helped him dude, should not I be proud? I faced problems only to keep ABC out of a few.' The 'I' becomes so dominant.
But when we fail at same. we justify. 'I was not in a position to. I have my own priorities. How could I have helped yaar?God will do something.I can just think good for him' Now. God has the responsibilities.
This is the fight that usually goes on. I v/s God. Pride versus Justification. That is the moment when not our degrees but our virtues matter. When life teaches a lesson, it usually is a permanent one. One that we keep with ourselves throughout the different phases of seeing the world.
So, for me. It is the time to get working. I will not justify. I will work not just to make myself not feel guilty but also to bring a smile on somebody's face. Hope it will work.
No comments:
Post a Comment